Diagnosis: Fart in the Heart Disease

Last night, I was playing "Doctor" with my daughters and suddenly, without warning, Mia began to feel a cramp in her stomach.  She had spontaneously developed a condition which may be as foreign to you as it was to me.  She had a fart lodged in her heart.

This morning as I was telling a friend about her strange disease, I joked that it sounded like a prophetic word for someone.  Then I got to thinking...maybe it really is a prophetic word.  Last night when she first mentioned the fart in her heart, I laughed (potty humor is still funny to me) and asked her how she thinks of these crazy things.  What stands out to me is her response...

"I don't have thoughts.  You THINK.  But I just DO."

So there it is.  Perhaps the disease is not so foreign after all.  It's no doubt a word for me at times, but perhaps it applies to you as well.  It's symptoms include the translation of the words God is speaking to us into complicated thoughts, deep "processes", unhealthy introspection, and flesh-driven pondering?  Are we always working through something or trying to understand or figure out what we are receiving from the Lord before responding in obedience?

If these symptoms apply, you may be a victim of "Fart in the Heart" disease.

So what's the prescription?  Perhaps we need to take a spiritual antacid, release that bubble of hot air stuck in our hearts (let's just call it what it is...control), and start to ACT on what God speaks to us, rather than process through it.  Maybe Mia was onto something.  What would happen if believers everywhere stopped wrestling with our inadequacies and actually trusted our ability to hear God speak?  How much more effective would we be if we spent less time trying to understand and weigh the consequences of our obedience and spent more time stepping out with faith on what we hear?  Sure, it might get a little messy at times.  But I can't imagine that in the long run, holding a "fart in the heart" will result in less of a mess.  Now might be a good time to stop with the analogy.

So today I'm repenting for being too careful and cautious (in the name of wisdom) and for trying too hard to do it all perfectly.  I'm releasing control - the control of myself - and choosing to respond with faith to the voice of God when I hear it.  I believe that God can speak to me clearly enough to help me stay in the center of His will and that if I somehow misunderstand what He is saying and make a mess, that he is a good Father and will turn my messes into something that is beautiful.

  

God speaks to me when I sleep

A few weeks ago, Mia came down from her nap, got my attention, and threw herself on the floor.  She laid there for a few seconds with her arms and legs all sprawled out and then picked herself up and said,
"Dad...if we wanna learn how to stand, we also gotta learn how to fall."
I asked her how she knew that and she replied, "God speaks to me when I sleep."

There was a "push" in my dance

As I read over my FaceBook status updates from 2010/2011, I am struck by the extreme differences in the way God has designed my daughters and their little (or should i say, big) personalities.   Two children, 15 months apart, the same gender, raised by the same parents...and yet polar opposites in many regards.  They have some similarities - for example, both are gorgeous, very smart, and sensitive to the needs of others.  They have an astounding relationship with the Lord as well - even at their young age.  But for all their similarities, I absolutely adore their differences.  

Here is a perfect illustration of what I'm talking about:

6/4/11
Keziah is turning 5 Tuesday! We got her a goldfish - it's her first pet.  Now, if only I can keep Mia from killing it. She already asked if she can poke it.

...a few months later, I wrote this:

8/10/11

Kezi's bday fish died today. When she discovered it, Keziah bawled her eyes out and wanted us to discuss with her the ins and outs of death - why, where did it go, will the same thing happen to her, what will happen to her if Janelle and I die, etc. 

When Mia heard the news, she said "I think it's in the trash. Can I see it?" Two very different kids. 

Mia was right. It was in the trash. She asked if she could see it and so I...well...I showed her. Is that bad?  She was going to search for it anyway.  I figured I might as well give a supervised visitation.  Who knows what would happen under other circumstances.  Mia thought it was pretty cool at first and tried to poke it (as u will recall from an earlier post, she had asked if she could when we first got it) and then decided it was gross and yelled "ew."

 Kezi...cried some more. 

Here are some more that stand out to me.  Certain reoccurring themes will not escape your attention:

Keziah... 

1/19/10
I'm wondering what to tell my 3 year-old (Keziah), when totally unprompted by me or my wife, she tells us that parents who don't want their babies put them in trash cans and asks if we can have them instead. Be praying this week against the abortion "super center" that is being established in Houston, Texas.

10/14/10
While Keziah was looking at pictures of janelle and i, tears started dripping down her cheeks. We asked her why she was crying and she said, "cause I love u so much." 

09/10/10
My little Mia is sick and staying home from school with me today. When Keziah heard this, she started crying and wanted to stay home too. She said, "I need to stay home. Or else Mia will get all the hugs."

6/11/11
Keziah is nervous for her pre-k graduation. She asked janelle if she can go out and wait in the van. Mia was having a temper tantrum and in kezi's words, "I just can't handle this before my graduation." 

3/10/11

Keziah - "Dad, you know what I like about you? That you drink wine so much." 

Mia...

09/05/10
Mia touched my heart today when she said all on her own, "daddy, I love u..." and then she burst my bubble when under her breath I heard her call me a "...poopy butt."

10/02/10
During worship, my wife was holding Mia.  She looked down & saw her eyes closed & lips moving with what appeared to be an intense expression of adoration for the Father on her face.  Touched by this, Janelle leaned in to hear her singing "poopy butt."

12/03/10
Mia didn't just pee in her pants. Her baby "spit" in them.

6/2011
Mia just hit kezi and was given the option of having a time-out or apologizing. She asked for a time out. Really?


6/20/11
Last night, Janelle and i were trying to encourage Keziah to stop sucking her thumb - now that she is 5 and a big girl. Mia wanted to help. 

"Instead of sucking my fingers, I just stick them in my nose," she offered. And up her nostrils they went.

6/4/11
U know ur tan is fading when ur 3 year old is singing "Jesus loves the little children" and tells u not to forget YOUR skin color - "kinda purpley." I had no idea it was that bad.


5/26/11
"dont touch me. I have a personal bubble around me."

4/2/11
Mia's impromptu prayer before nap: "dear larrrrrrd (heavy on the "r"), please take kezi to jail. Amen."

3/6/11
While dancing in the livingroom, without warning, Mia ran over and pushed Keziah. When asked the cause of her assault, Mia replied, "there was a push in my dance." 

Of course. What was I thinking?